Many couples get stuck in the stories about what annoys them about their partner or what is not working in their relationship. It takes intentionality to bring your focus to what is working. Take the time to tell you partner what you appreciate about them on a daily basis.
One of my favorite things to do with my partner, is to sit down and play the gratitude game. We just go back and forth telling each other everything we are grateful for. About each other, about our relationship, about our lives. At the end of a session like this, our moods are completely elevated and it really didn’t take much. It didn’t cost us anything. We didn’t have to go anywhere. We simply brought our focus to everything that is going well and that we are thankful for.
Our brains have a negativity bias, meaning they are automatically searching for any threat to our survival. Because of this bias, we have to work double time to bring out the positivity.
You can listen to me riffing on this topic on the Relationship Renovation podcast here:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/foreboding-joy-and-pleasure-the-i mportance/id1452940459?i=1000517416342
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